Friday, June 10, 2011

What Lies Beneath

We Lash Out.

Theses are difficult times and we often feel lost, alone, and angry.

It is human nature to sometimes lash out at others during moments of frustration, but we can learn to navigate our feelings without losing our center.

Each one of us has experienced situations where we have found ourselves lashing out at someone without meaning to. We later berate ourselves for losing control and feel guilty for treating the other person badly.

While it is human nature that our emotions and moods will get the better of us from time to time, we can learn to navigate our feelings and negotiate difficult situations without losing our center.

Often, when we lash out, it is because we are having a difficult time containing the emotions that are coming up inside of us. We may be feeling overwhelmed, afraid, frustrated, stressed out, or angry.

Having these feelings boiling up inside of us can be very uncomfortable, and it is natural to want to release them. However, when we release our feelings from our body by directing them outward and toward someone else, they inevitably impact the “innocent bystander” to whom we are directing this energy.

They not only receive the brunt of our anger, frustration, or stress, but also they can actually experience this energy as a physical force hitting their bodies.

When we find ourselves in a situation where we are about to lash out at the person in front of us, we need to try to center yourselves -- perhaps by breathing slowly and deeply and in prayer.

A few moments in reflective prayer, listening to God, can help us to be rid of our feelings before they escape us and become a part of our world.

Once we are able to sit and find yourselves in a more reflective state, we can take a moment to recall the feelings in our bodies just before and during our outburst.

We can note where we feel sensations coming up in wihin us and we can ask ourselves if they are connected to any core issue or experience from our lives.

If nothing comes to mind, we can then revisit the situation, exaggerating the details of what happened by indulging in outlandish “what if” fantasies.

Exaggerating events after the fact can help expose the unconscious subtext behind your heated response. Understanding the motivation behind our reactions can help us to avoid lashing out again when a similar situation comes up.

In learning to navigate around our emotions, we are giving ourselves the tools needed in order to become better the next time our emotions begin to boil.

In doing so, we can take care of ourselves by alleviating your own uncomfortable feelings while respecting and protecting those around us and those whom we love and care for.

With love, light, balance, and a sense for stability,

Rob