We all have times in our lives when we truly believe we don't have the strength to carry on.
However, we do have that strength, and we can carry on.
We have all faced moments in our lives when the pressures of our various commitments and situations mount far beyond what we feel we can handle, and we find ourselves believing that we just no longer have the strength to carry on and continue.
Perhaps we overcame a major obstacle or illness, only to find another one waiting for us; as though that proverbial light at the end of the tunnel is just another train wreck headed straight for us.
Catching our breath between these trials seem to only allow us to drown.
At times we suffer one loss after another, and we wonder if we will ever enjoy a respite from life's travails.
It never seems fair or right that life should push us harder and demand more of us when we believe we have given all we can.
This, however, is life.
When we look back upon our lives, we see that we have in fact survived many trials and tribulations and we have surmounted many obstacles; quite often to our own amazement.
In each instance, we broke through our concepts of how much we could handle and we delved deeper into our own reserves.
We have no concept of what our faith and stamina provides us.
At times, when we feel we do not have the strength to handle the situations that life has dealt us, it is as though we are against the hard type of surface of a frozen lake.
Our obstacle, or challenges as they are, appear as an impenetrable, hard, cold fact.
However, once we break through it, we find that a deep reservoir of energy and inspiration was trapped beneath that hard, cold surface.
Sometimes we break through this ice by cutting a hole into our resistance with our willpower.
Other times we melt away the ice with the warmth of compassion.
Either way, we endure and we walk away with a renewed realization of our values and strength in our confidence of the faith which keeps us alive; the Spirit that exists within us.
When we find ourselves breathless and against that frozen between us and our faith and the very oxygen it provides, and we think we cannot handle the situation we are presented with, we may just find it best to choose to love ourselves as well as the resistance we face.
We can simply accept that we are overwhelmed, exhausted, and tried, and we can allow ourselves to accept our internal loving kindness and compassion, giving our situation into the loving warmth our our Creator's care.
If we can channel the unconditional warmth of God's love, before we know it the ice will melt away and turn to a warm and refreshing spring.
With love & warm waters,
Rob
Saturday, June 19, 2010
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Balance and Prayer in Everyday Life
I've had the most blessed past two years.
Those of you who know me might wrinkle a forehead and raise an eyebrow at that statement and say "what?"
As my life became more challenged, I sought a center of peace and balance.
So, I began collecting flat river stones and stacking them in strategic areas throughout the house, as well as my office in New York and my office in Pennsylvania.
One stone stack was outside where I shower and prepare for the day.
Another was on my desk in New York.
If I rushed past the doorway leading from the bath to the main part of the house, my vibration would cause he stones to fall out of balance and tumble.
The same would happen at my office if I were to be harsh with closing a drawer or reacting upon the desk when annoyed with a situation.
The ensuing reality was that I would have to take the time to delicately balance the stones again, which allowed some private time for me to concentrate, or meditate ... otherwise, to be in prayer.
"Please God, teach me that anger and haste only creates a delay in your plan."
If you were to visit my office in Mount Pocono, you would find an area filled with "Cairns" or "Prayer Stones". One is even a fountain from which water flows.
There is much to be said about water in our lives.
Stone has played a role in spirituality from the very moment humanity externalized its sacred vision.
As early humans, we gave form to our devotion by scratching images of our impression of our deities into rock faces, carving holy statuary, and building stone shrines.
The earliest of these were nothing more than simple piles of rocks that honored sacred places, revelations, people, and events.
Following in the footsteps of this ancient tradition provides us with an simple and beautiful way to externalize our own spirituality.
In our travels, we may have encountered on the sides of roads, trails, or pathways stacks of stones that look like random sculpture.
Add a stone blessed with a prayer to such a mound, and our intentions merge with those who have left stones before us, empowering us all.
Associating a prayer with a particular stone alters the substance of both, and the formation of a prayer mound can balance and intensify the energy of a site.
The mere act of choosing a stone can inspire mindfulness, as we lose ourselves in the moment seeking a pebble that speaks to our souls. And placing a prayer stone on a towering cairn is a meditation in patience and slowness as stillness allows us to find our stone's center of gravity so the delicate ceremonial structure before us remains intact.
We must be cautious, however, when when we feel guided to place a prayer rock upon stone mounds we see intermittently alongside well-worn but unmarked hiking paths. Hikers often use small cairns as guide markers to ensure that those who follow in their footsteps will not lose the trail.
When in doubt, begin a new prayer pile slightly further away from the path itself and consider adding a relic of some kind to help others understand its purpose.
When we mindfully place a prayer by beginning a stone heap or adding to an existing mound, our thoughts and intentions are left in the care of faith itself.
The cairn of which our prayer was one part may be unintentionally knocked down or destroyed by Mother Nature's own hand. We need not let this weigh heavily upon our spirit.
The potent energy of our prayer would be released by this destruction, ensuring that the purpose underlying that prayer will spread outward in the direction of the furthest reaches of the universe.
So, walk through natures path, utilizing the most solid of God's creation to find a moment to seek balance and prayer.
With love, light, and a prayer for the balance of your rock,
Rob
I've had the most blessed past two years.
Those of you who know me might wrinkle a forehead and raise an eyebrow at that statement and say "what?"
As my life became more challenged, I sought a center of peace and balance.
So, I began collecting flat river stones and stacking them in strategic areas throughout the house, as well as my office in New York and my office in Pennsylvania.
One stone stack was outside where I shower and prepare for the day.
Another was on my desk in New York.
If I rushed past the doorway leading from the bath to the main part of the house, my vibration would cause he stones to fall out of balance and tumble.
The same would happen at my office if I were to be harsh with closing a drawer or reacting upon the desk when annoyed with a situation.
The ensuing reality was that I would have to take the time to delicately balance the stones again, which allowed some private time for me to concentrate, or meditate ... otherwise, to be in prayer.
"Please God, teach me that anger and haste only creates a delay in your plan."
If you were to visit my office in Mount Pocono, you would find an area filled with "Cairns" or "Prayer Stones". One is even a fountain from which water flows.
There is much to be said about water in our lives.
Stone has played a role in spirituality from the very moment humanity externalized its sacred vision.
As early humans, we gave form to our devotion by scratching images of our impression of our deities into rock faces, carving holy statuary, and building stone shrines.
The earliest of these were nothing more than simple piles of rocks that honored sacred places, revelations, people, and events.
Following in the footsteps of this ancient tradition provides us with an simple and beautiful way to externalize our own spirituality.
In our travels, we may have encountered on the sides of roads, trails, or pathways stacks of stones that look like random sculpture.
Add a stone blessed with a prayer to such a mound, and our intentions merge with those who have left stones before us, empowering us all.
Associating a prayer with a particular stone alters the substance of both, and the formation of a prayer mound can balance and intensify the energy of a site.
The mere act of choosing a stone can inspire mindfulness, as we lose ourselves in the moment seeking a pebble that speaks to our souls. And placing a prayer stone on a towering cairn is a meditation in patience and slowness as stillness allows us to find our stone's center of gravity so the delicate ceremonial structure before us remains intact.
We must be cautious, however, when when we feel guided to place a prayer rock upon stone mounds we see intermittently alongside well-worn but unmarked hiking paths. Hikers often use small cairns as guide markers to ensure that those who follow in their footsteps will not lose the trail.
When in doubt, begin a new prayer pile slightly further away from the path itself and consider adding a relic of some kind to help others understand its purpose.
When we mindfully place a prayer by beginning a stone heap or adding to an existing mound, our thoughts and intentions are left in the care of faith itself.
The cairn of which our prayer was one part may be unintentionally knocked down or destroyed by Mother Nature's own hand. We need not let this weigh heavily upon our spirit.
The potent energy of our prayer would be released by this destruction, ensuring that the purpose underlying that prayer will spread outward in the direction of the furthest reaches of the universe.
So, walk through natures path, utilizing the most solid of God's creation to find a moment to seek balance and prayer.
With love, light, and a prayer for the balance of your rock,
Rob
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Why Not Now?
Waiting for Someday
If today is the day we choose to take our destiny into our own hands, we may discover that we hold the keys of fate.
The time we are blessed with is limited and tends to be used up all too quickly.
How we utilize our time is consequently one of the most important decisions we make.
However, it is far too easy to put off until tomorrow what we are dreaming of today.
The hectic pace of modern existence affords us an easy out; we shelve our aspirations so we can cope more effectively with the challenges of the present, ostensibly to have more time and leisure to realize our purpose in the future. Or we tell ourselves that we will chase our dreams someday once we have accomplished other lesser goals.
In truth, it is our fear that keeps us from seeking fulfillment in the here and now because we view failure as a possibility, so our reasons for delaying our inevitable success seem sound and rational.
If we ask ourselves what we are really waiting for, however, we discover that there is no truly compelling reason why we should put off the pursuit of the dreams that sustain us.
When regarded as a question, "Why not now?" drains us of our power to realize our ambitions.
We are so concerned with the notion that we are somehow undeserving of happiness that we cannot see that there is much we can do in the present to begin courting it. Yet when we look decisively at our existence and state, "Why not now, indeed!" we are empowered to begin changing our lives this very moment.
We procrastinate for many reasons, from a perceived lack of time to a legitimate
lack of self-belief, but the truth of the matter is that there is no time like the present and no time but the present.
Whatever we aim to accomplish, we will achieve it more quickly and with a greater degree of efficiency when we seize the day and make the most of the resources we have at our disposal presently.
All the joy, passion, and contentment we can envision can be ours right now, rather than in some far-flung point in time.
We need only remind ourselves that there is nothing standing between us and fulfillment.
If today is the day we choose to take our destiny into our own hands, we will discover that we hold the keys of fate.
Why not now?
With love & light,
Rob
If today is the day we choose to take our destiny into our own hands, we may discover that we hold the keys of fate.
The time we are blessed with is limited and tends to be used up all too quickly.
How we utilize our time is consequently one of the most important decisions we make.
However, it is far too easy to put off until tomorrow what we are dreaming of today.
The hectic pace of modern existence affords us an easy out; we shelve our aspirations so we can cope more effectively with the challenges of the present, ostensibly to have more time and leisure to realize our purpose in the future. Or we tell ourselves that we will chase our dreams someday once we have accomplished other lesser goals.
In truth, it is our fear that keeps us from seeking fulfillment in the here and now because we view failure as a possibility, so our reasons for delaying our inevitable success seem sound and rational.
If we ask ourselves what we are really waiting for, however, we discover that there is no truly compelling reason why we should put off the pursuit of the dreams that sustain us.
When regarded as a question, "Why not now?" drains us of our power to realize our ambitions.
We are so concerned with the notion that we are somehow undeserving of happiness that we cannot see that there is much we can do in the present to begin courting it. Yet when we look decisively at our existence and state, "Why not now, indeed!" we are empowered to begin changing our lives this very moment.
We procrastinate for many reasons, from a perceived lack of time to a legitimate
lack of self-belief, but the truth of the matter is that there is no time like the present and no time but the present.
Whatever we aim to accomplish, we will achieve it more quickly and with a greater degree of efficiency when we seize the day and make the most of the resources we have at our disposal presently.
All the joy, passion, and contentment we can envision can be ours right now, rather than in some far-flung point in time.
We need only remind ourselves that there is nothing standing between us and fulfillment.
If today is the day we choose to take our destiny into our own hands, we will discover that we hold the keys of fate.
Why not now?
With love & light,
Rob
Monday, May 10, 2010
Magical Wishes
We often wish.
From blowing Dandelion seeds into the air, to tossing a coin into a fountain, we have all felt inspired to make a wish ... to whisper into the ears of the universe and release our desires to the powers that be and wait for signs that they have been heard.
Some wishes do come true, and others are left to the ethereal life where they remain as visions that either stay with us or fade as a star in the light of the morning.
No matter if our wishes come true or not, wishes are important missives, expressing our hearts desire as well as our intention to create something new in our lives.
When we wish for something, our consciousness opens us to be receptive, like a flower unfolding its petals to receeive a bee.
There is something innocent and magical about making a wish, something that recalls the energy of childhood.
Wishing is not about formulating a plan and following it step by step to obtain a goal, which is more aligned with adulthood, and it is not the same as prayer.
Rather, wishing is more similar to a playful volley.
Waiting and hoping for the response we wish for is an integral part of the process.
When we wish, we feel something lift in the center of our chest ... possibly where our actual spirit exists.
Wishing inspires an innocent opening to the possibility of "magic" to happen.
This opening is beauty in and of itself, regardless of the outcome.
When we wish, we place ourselves in a magical mindeset, and that mindset is as wonderful as the wish itself.
In the straightforward, action oriented society in whieh we live, we may tend to dismiss the power of this seemingly passive process,. However, the power of a wish is well known, hence the popular phrase (especially by me) "be careful what you wish for".
When we realize that we have given up the childhood beauty of wishing in favor of more adult pursuits, we might like to bring its magic back into our life.
So, the next time you see the first star in the evening sky, cast away the seedlings of a Dandelion, flip a coin into a fountain, or find yourself in front of a birthday cake complete with flaming candles, give yourself the gift of the magical wonder we knew so well as children.
Close your eyes, open your mind to fantasy, and make your wish.
Wishing you the magic of childhood dreams,
Rob
From blowing Dandelion seeds into the air, to tossing a coin into a fountain, we have all felt inspired to make a wish ... to whisper into the ears of the universe and release our desires to the powers that be and wait for signs that they have been heard.
Some wishes do come true, and others are left to the ethereal life where they remain as visions that either stay with us or fade as a star in the light of the morning.
No matter if our wishes come true or not, wishes are important missives, expressing our hearts desire as well as our intention to create something new in our lives.
When we wish for something, our consciousness opens us to be receptive, like a flower unfolding its petals to receeive a bee.
There is something innocent and magical about making a wish, something that recalls the energy of childhood.
Wishing is not about formulating a plan and following it step by step to obtain a goal, which is more aligned with adulthood, and it is not the same as prayer.
Rather, wishing is more similar to a playful volley.
Waiting and hoping for the response we wish for is an integral part of the process.
When we wish, we feel something lift in the center of our chest ... possibly where our actual spirit exists.
Wishing inspires an innocent opening to the possibility of "magic" to happen.
This opening is beauty in and of itself, regardless of the outcome.
When we wish, we place ourselves in a magical mindeset, and that mindset is as wonderful as the wish itself.
In the straightforward, action oriented society in whieh we live, we may tend to dismiss the power of this seemingly passive process,. However, the power of a wish is well known, hence the popular phrase (especially by me) "be careful what you wish for".
When we realize that we have given up the childhood beauty of wishing in favor of more adult pursuits, we might like to bring its magic back into our life.
So, the next time you see the first star in the evening sky, cast away the seedlings of a Dandelion, flip a coin into a fountain, or find yourself in front of a birthday cake complete with flaming candles, give yourself the gift of the magical wonder we knew so well as children.
Close your eyes, open your mind to fantasy, and make your wish.
Wishing you the magic of childhood dreams,
Rob
Monday, April 19, 2010
Hold my place?
.
Perhaps we can recall a time in our childhood when we asked a friend, or one we did not yet know, to "hold our place" in a line.
Some of us recall this while in line for lunch as a young child in school, while we retrieved a notebook left behind ... or while we left someone alone while we sought a more familiar friend.
Some of us recall this while in line for concert tickets as a young adult while we fetched coffee to keep us awake and safe while camping out on an overnight line.
However, each of us will one day experience this as a moment when one of us will ask the other to hold on to us as we move on through a challenging time ... or as we die.
At some point, we will be asked to "just be there".
One of the greatest gifts we can give another human being is to act as their guardian ... their caregiver.
Whether this gift is related to a specific situation or is representative of an ongoing commitment, we each benefit from the association.
We are given a family to love and be loved by, and we meet friends and partners with whom to share the same.
In love, there is an absolute and eternal protection and projection of the spirit within us.
To protect someone is to walk with that person in challenging times and see them through safely to the other side of it.
In doing so, we grow with them, regardless of where their journey is calling them ... or us.
Those within our care derive confidence from our support and assistance, enabling them to persevere through almost any condition.
There are many reasons we feel inspired to serve as caregivers to those for whom we so do.
Sometimes just holding the place for somebody allows them to do what is necessary to grow or heal.
Sometimes, just holding that place for somebody can be very lonely and worrisome.
We may simply want to see that our friend or loved one is taken care of and equipped to prevail over difficult circumstances.
We may also sense that we are in possession of knowledge our loved ones are lacking yet need in their current stage of development.
Our offer to serve as a caregiver may also be both unsolicited and unrelated to any one situation.
Instead of helping someone we care about to cope with a specific challenge, we may find ourselves providing them with a more general form of emotional sustenance that prepares and strengthens them for challenges yet to come.
Perhaps even our own energy can absorb the ills from within those for whom we tend to, and even bring about healing, be it physical or spiritual.
Our ability to empathize with those under our guardianship is our greatest asset, because our comprehension of their needs allows us to determine how we can best serve them.
Even when this comprehension is limited, however, the loving intentions with which we enter into our role as guardians and caregivers ensure that our care and protection help others grow as individuals while living their lives with grace.
This is also true in the case of guardianship of our unknown friends ... strangers.
That is what is known as being graceful.
Of course, we understand that this comes from a Spiritual Grace, with which we are blessed.
Grace is always with us.
It flows like a river through our lives, artfully reminding us that there is magic and power beyond what our eyes can see.
At times we catch its subtle beauty, such as during chance meetings, near misses, and insights that seem to come from nowhere.
Other times we experience Grace in all its powerful surety, certainty, and security, such as when a job comes to an end.
Though we may forget that this is Grace at work too, it is indeed influencing our lives, helping us to move forward and take the next step.
Grace exists in all situations, and in every moment. Yet all too often we may overlook its presence.
Imagine how it might feel to live an entire day in absolute Grace, to fully appreciate that our day is unfolding in absolute perfection. Whereas usually we might miss the mystical spirituality in ordinary events and interactions.
Perhaps, on such a particular day, we would recognize each and every blessing that we are granted as miracles.
Perhaps we would begin with our first deep breaths in the morning, becoming aware that there is an abundant supply of air for us to breathe.
That is Grace.
Our lungs know just how to carry oxygen to our blood, and our blood knows where to carry it from there.
This too is Grace.
We might appreciate the pleasant warmth of Spring, the brilliant sunshine of Summer, the enriching colors of Autumn, or the dazzling display of snow and ice that Winter offers us, and appreciate that they greet us at every turn; never knowing if we will return there again.
We might notice the ease with which we do our job or laugh with a close friend.
These things are all Grace.
Even when we lay our heads down at the end of this day, and every day right through the final one, we rest rest in the stillness of night, and that is Grace.
With each opportunity we give ourselves, we empower ourselves to the energetic current of benevolence, which consists of the connection between one of us and another as we hold each other's places in Grace, that we may discover a deeper peace.
We might begin to wonder if struggle is really all that necessary after all.
That last statement is truly one of Grace.
By living just one day in Grace, we might open the door to many more.
So, I must ask you ....
Will you hold my place?
With love, light, and an outstretched palm of hand for you to lead me,
Rob
Perhaps we can recall a time in our childhood when we asked a friend, or one we did not yet know, to "hold our place" in a line.
Some of us recall this while in line for lunch as a young child in school, while we retrieved a notebook left behind ... or while we left someone alone while we sought a more familiar friend.
Some of us recall this while in line for concert tickets as a young adult while we fetched coffee to keep us awake and safe while camping out on an overnight line.
However, each of us will one day experience this as a moment when one of us will ask the other to hold on to us as we move on through a challenging time ... or as we die.
At some point, we will be asked to "just be there".
One of the greatest gifts we can give another human being is to act as their guardian ... their caregiver.
Whether this gift is related to a specific situation or is representative of an ongoing commitment, we each benefit from the association.
We are given a family to love and be loved by, and we meet friends and partners with whom to share the same.
In love, there is an absolute and eternal protection and projection of the spirit within us.
To protect someone is to walk with that person in challenging times and see them through safely to the other side of it.
In doing so, we grow with them, regardless of where their journey is calling them ... or us.
Those within our care derive confidence from our support and assistance, enabling them to persevere through almost any condition.
There are many reasons we feel inspired to serve as caregivers to those for whom we so do.
Sometimes just holding the place for somebody allows them to do what is necessary to grow or heal.
Sometimes, just holding that place for somebody can be very lonely and worrisome.
We may simply want to see that our friend or loved one is taken care of and equipped to prevail over difficult circumstances.
We may also sense that we are in possession of knowledge our loved ones are lacking yet need in their current stage of development.
Our offer to serve as a caregiver may also be both unsolicited and unrelated to any one situation.
Instead of helping someone we care about to cope with a specific challenge, we may find ourselves providing them with a more general form of emotional sustenance that prepares and strengthens them for challenges yet to come.
Perhaps even our own energy can absorb the ills from within those for whom we tend to, and even bring about healing, be it physical or spiritual.
Our ability to empathize with those under our guardianship is our greatest asset, because our comprehension of their needs allows us to determine how we can best serve them.
Even when this comprehension is limited, however, the loving intentions with which we enter into our role as guardians and caregivers ensure that our care and protection help others grow as individuals while living their lives with grace.
This is also true in the case of guardianship of our unknown friends ... strangers.
That is what is known as being graceful.
Of course, we understand that this comes from a Spiritual Grace, with which we are blessed.
Grace is always with us.
It flows like a river through our lives, artfully reminding us that there is magic and power beyond what our eyes can see.
At times we catch its subtle beauty, such as during chance meetings, near misses, and insights that seem to come from nowhere.
Other times we experience Grace in all its powerful surety, certainty, and security, such as when a job comes to an end.
Though we may forget that this is Grace at work too, it is indeed influencing our lives, helping us to move forward and take the next step.
Grace exists in all situations, and in every moment. Yet all too often we may overlook its presence.
Imagine how it might feel to live an entire day in absolute Grace, to fully appreciate that our day is unfolding in absolute perfection. Whereas usually we might miss the mystical spirituality in ordinary events and interactions.
Perhaps, on such a particular day, we would recognize each and every blessing that we are granted as miracles.
Perhaps we would begin with our first deep breaths in the morning, becoming aware that there is an abundant supply of air for us to breathe.
That is Grace.
Our lungs know just how to carry oxygen to our blood, and our blood knows where to carry it from there.
This too is Grace.
We might appreciate the pleasant warmth of Spring, the brilliant sunshine of Summer, the enriching colors of Autumn, or the dazzling display of snow and ice that Winter offers us, and appreciate that they greet us at every turn; never knowing if we will return there again.
We might notice the ease with which we do our job or laugh with a close friend.
These things are all Grace.
Even when we lay our heads down at the end of this day, and every day right through the final one, we rest rest in the stillness of night, and that is Grace.
With each opportunity we give ourselves, we empower ourselves to the energetic current of benevolence, which consists of the connection between one of us and another as we hold each other's places in Grace, that we may discover a deeper peace.
We might begin to wonder if struggle is really all that necessary after all.
That last statement is truly one of Grace.
By living just one day in Grace, we might open the door to many more.
So, I must ask you ....
Will you hold my place?
With love, light, and an outstretched palm of hand for you to lead me,
Rob
Saturday, April 17, 2010
Burdensome Feelings
Burdensome Feelings ...
Blaming Others.
During my Education for Ministry class this past Sunday, we discussed "letting go". More specifically, letting go of "blame".
Such a silly word.
If you say it a few times, it just begins to sound ridiculous.
Blaming sets up a situation in which it becomes difficult to move forward and puts resolution in the hands of others.
As we begin to truly understand that the world outside of us is a reflection of the world inside of us, we may feel confused about who is to blame for the problems in our lives.
If we had a difficult childhood, we may wonder how we can take responsibility for that, and in our current relationships, the same question arises.
We all know that blaming others is the opposite of taking responsibility, but we may not understand how to take responsibility for things that we don’t truly feel responsible for.
We may blame our parents, teachers, and elders for our low self-esteem, and we may blame our current partner for exacerbating it with their unconscious behavior.
Objectively, this seems to make sense. After all, it is not our fault if others were irresponsible or unkind, and we are not to blame for our partner’s bad behavior.
Perhaps the problem lies with the activity of blaming.
Whether we blame others or blame ourselves, there is something aggressive and unkind about it.
It sets up a situation in which it becomes difficult to move forward under the burdensome feelings of shame and guilt that arise. It also puts the resolution of our pain in the hands of someone other than us.
Ultimately, we cannot insist that someone else take responsibility for their actions; only they can make that choice when they are ready.
In the meantime, if we want to move forward with our lives instead of waiting around for something that may or may not happen, we begin to see the wisdom of taking the situation into our own hands.
We do this by forgiving others, even if they have not asked for our forgiveness, so that we can be free. We end our abusive relationships with those who may never admit to any wrongdoing, because we are willing to take responsibility for how we are treated.
In short, we love ourselves as we want to be loved and create the life we know we deserve. We leave the resolution of the wrongs committed against us in the hands of God, releasing ourselves to live a life free of blame, allow ourselves the gift of forgiveness.
With love, light, and forgiveness,
Rob
Blaming Others.
During my Education for Ministry class this past Sunday, we discussed "letting go". More specifically, letting go of "blame".
Such a silly word.
If you say it a few times, it just begins to sound ridiculous.
Blaming sets up a situation in which it becomes difficult to move forward and puts resolution in the hands of others.
As we begin to truly understand that the world outside of us is a reflection of the world inside of us, we may feel confused about who is to blame for the problems in our lives.
If we had a difficult childhood, we may wonder how we can take responsibility for that, and in our current relationships, the same question arises.
We all know that blaming others is the opposite of taking responsibility, but we may not understand how to take responsibility for things that we don’t truly feel responsible for.
We may blame our parents, teachers, and elders for our low self-esteem, and we may blame our current partner for exacerbating it with their unconscious behavior.
Objectively, this seems to make sense. After all, it is not our fault if others were irresponsible or unkind, and we are not to blame for our partner’s bad behavior.
Perhaps the problem lies with the activity of blaming.
Whether we blame others or blame ourselves, there is something aggressive and unkind about it.
It sets up a situation in which it becomes difficult to move forward under the burdensome feelings of shame and guilt that arise. It also puts the resolution of our pain in the hands of someone other than us.
Ultimately, we cannot insist that someone else take responsibility for their actions; only they can make that choice when they are ready.
In the meantime, if we want to move forward with our lives instead of waiting around for something that may or may not happen, we begin to see the wisdom of taking the situation into our own hands.
We do this by forgiving others, even if they have not asked for our forgiveness, so that we can be free. We end our abusive relationships with those who may never admit to any wrongdoing, because we are willing to take responsibility for how we are treated.
In short, we love ourselves as we want to be loved and create the life we know we deserve. We leave the resolution of the wrongs committed against us in the hands of God, releasing ourselves to live a life free of blame, allow ourselves the gift of forgiveness.
With love, light, and forgiveness,
Rob
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Shake Your Tail Feathers
"Dance like no one is watching. Sing like no one is listening. Love like you've never been hurt, and live like it's heaven on Earth." — Mark Twain
Most of us express our distinctiveness in many ways throughout our lives.
We proudly share our offbeat traits and preferences with the world. However, we take great pains to downplay those eccentricities that we ourselves deem odd. Instead of living lives colored by these quirky impulses, we seek out socially acceptable outlets for our peculiarities.
We may not realize that we are editing ourselves in this way because our individual societal awareness is unintentionally attuned to the attitudes of the people we encounter each day.
Over time, we have learned to suppress some of the most fun aspects of individuality.
To rediscover and embrace these buried traits, we need only ask ourselves what we would do if we knew for certain that no one would judge our choices.
Visualizing this can help us to better understand the idiosyncrasies that are an important part of who we are, but seldom manifest in our existence. Perhaps we secretly dream of replacing grown-up, conservative clothing and behavior in favor of a varying array of frivolity.
Our imagination takes us in unexpectedly simple directions. In our musings, we may see ourselves doing things which tend to the nature of our suppressed peculiarities. We may ask what is really stopping us from making them a part of our lives, and then resolve to incorporate at least one into our everyday existence.
We can become our own muse, our own Calliope.
Life as we know it is so short.
Making the most of years we are granted is a matter of being ourselves even though we know that we will inevitably encounter people who disapprove of our choices.
When we shake our tail feathers like no one is watching, we discover that there are many others who appreciate us because we are willing to let go of social inhibition.
By doing this, we help others to know it is okay to do the same.
No two people in the world are precisely alike, and each time we revel in this simple fact, we rededicate ourselves to the celebration of individuality.
Often, the societal nonacceptance of individuality prevents us of certain simple pleasures, and we put off what we would like to do for enjoyment in pursuit of more basic duties and responsibilities.
Procrastination is almost a universal human habit and one that infiltrates nearly every aspect of our lives.
Modern existence is so complex, and much of what we long to do is left by the wayside. We know what is important to our individuality and our happiness, but we tend to let the weight of worldly pressures lead us astray.
To get back on track, however, we need only take a moment to consider where our thoughts will be as we take our last breath on this earth.
More likely than not, at that instant, disagreements, bills, petty annoyances, and other frustrating elements of our lives will no longer seem as significant as they once did.
Remembrances of loved ones and the positive impact we had on the world would no doubt occupy our remaining thoughts. Whatever we imagine ourselves musing upon during our last breath will almost always be representative of what truly matters to us.
This simple exercise introduces us to a new way of thinking.
While our attention is drawn momentarily to the end of life, our contemplations serve to point out that we are masters of our own perspective and, consequently, our own existence.
We can choose to spend more of our time and energy on what gives our lives meaning. We can spend more time with loved ones and do more of what we enjoy. We can learn to allow our inner muse to tend to who we are.
Doing so may not always prove easy, and there will inevitably be times when circumstances interfere with our resolution, yet we do not have to regard this as an indication that our priorities are not in alignment with who we really are. Sometimes the only way we can see the beauty of life is to remind ourselves that it is finite.
Gandhi said, "Live as if you were to die tomorrow."
His words are a potent reminder that living life more fully is not about pushing ourselves harder or shouldering more burdens, but about experiencing all the wonderful richness life has to offer.
So, perhaps this Easter, we will each allow our inner spirit, our childhood, to re-emerge and live within us once again, bringing laughter and fun to the world around us.
After all, our life is a gift that was given for us to enjoy and share; and Life is Heaven on Earth.
With love & light,
Rob
Most of us express our distinctiveness in many ways throughout our lives.
We proudly share our offbeat traits and preferences with the world. However, we take great pains to downplay those eccentricities that we ourselves deem odd. Instead of living lives colored by these quirky impulses, we seek out socially acceptable outlets for our peculiarities.
We may not realize that we are editing ourselves in this way because our individual societal awareness is unintentionally attuned to the attitudes of the people we encounter each day.
Over time, we have learned to suppress some of the most fun aspects of individuality.
To rediscover and embrace these buried traits, we need only ask ourselves what we would do if we knew for certain that no one would judge our choices.
Visualizing this can help us to better understand the idiosyncrasies that are an important part of who we are, but seldom manifest in our existence. Perhaps we secretly dream of replacing grown-up, conservative clothing and behavior in favor of a varying array of frivolity.
Our imagination takes us in unexpectedly simple directions. In our musings, we may see ourselves doing things which tend to the nature of our suppressed peculiarities. We may ask what is really stopping us from making them a part of our lives, and then resolve to incorporate at least one into our everyday existence.
We can become our own muse, our own Calliope.
Life as we know it is so short.
Making the most of years we are granted is a matter of being ourselves even though we know that we will inevitably encounter people who disapprove of our choices.
When we shake our tail feathers like no one is watching, we discover that there are many others who appreciate us because we are willing to let go of social inhibition.
By doing this, we help others to know it is okay to do the same.
No two people in the world are precisely alike, and each time we revel in this simple fact, we rededicate ourselves to the celebration of individuality.
Often, the societal nonacceptance of individuality prevents us of certain simple pleasures, and we put off what we would like to do for enjoyment in pursuit of more basic duties and responsibilities.
Procrastination is almost a universal human habit and one that infiltrates nearly every aspect of our lives.
Modern existence is so complex, and much of what we long to do is left by the wayside. We know what is important to our individuality and our happiness, but we tend to let the weight of worldly pressures lead us astray.
To get back on track, however, we need only take a moment to consider where our thoughts will be as we take our last breath on this earth.
More likely than not, at that instant, disagreements, bills, petty annoyances, and other frustrating elements of our lives will no longer seem as significant as they once did.
Remembrances of loved ones and the positive impact we had on the world would no doubt occupy our remaining thoughts. Whatever we imagine ourselves musing upon during our last breath will almost always be representative of what truly matters to us.
This simple exercise introduces us to a new way of thinking.
While our attention is drawn momentarily to the end of life, our contemplations serve to point out that we are masters of our own perspective and, consequently, our own existence.
We can choose to spend more of our time and energy on what gives our lives meaning. We can spend more time with loved ones and do more of what we enjoy. We can learn to allow our inner muse to tend to who we are.
Doing so may not always prove easy, and there will inevitably be times when circumstances interfere with our resolution, yet we do not have to regard this as an indication that our priorities are not in alignment with who we really are. Sometimes the only way we can see the beauty of life is to remind ourselves that it is finite.
Gandhi said, "Live as if you were to die tomorrow."
His words are a potent reminder that living life more fully is not about pushing ourselves harder or shouldering more burdens, but about experiencing all the wonderful richness life has to offer.
So, perhaps this Easter, we will each allow our inner spirit, our childhood, to re-emerge and live within us once again, bringing laughter and fun to the world around us.
After all, our life is a gift that was given for us to enjoy and share; and Life is Heaven on Earth.
With love & light,
Rob
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