Anxiety About Change

In these trying times, we know not what life will offer us with regard to change.

My life changes every day, and I regret that I will never have the life which I've longed for, but I am blessed for the life that I have.

My life has changed, and I accept that. I wished, hoped and prayed for better, but I embrace the life I have with all of its realities and challenges and changes.

Change will occur in almost every aspect of our lives.

We can learn to embrace change while releasing the past with grace.

When we find ourselves going through any kind of change in our lives, our natural response may be to tense up on the physical, mental, or emotional level.

We may not even notice that we have braced ourselves against a shift until we recognize the anxiety, mood swings, or general worried feeling toward the unknown that usually results.

However, there are positive ways to move through change without pushing it away, or attempting to deny that change is happening.

Since change will occur in almost every aspect of our lives, we can learn to make our response to it an affirmative one of anticipation, welcoming the new while releasing the past with grace.

One thing we can do is change our perspective by changing the labels we use to identify our feelings.

We can reinterpret feelings of anxiety as the anxious butterflies in our bellies that come with eager expectation.

That nervous feeling, called "butterflies" also tells us something ... butterflies are signs of change and new life ... transformation.

With this transformation, we begin to look for the good that is on its way to us.

Though we may only be able to imagine the possibilities, when we acknowledge that good is there for us to find, we focus our energy on joyful anticipation and bring it into our experience while allowing the feelings to carry us forward.

We can also choose to do a ceremony to allow our emotions to process.

Every culture has created ceremonies to help people make the transition from one phase of life to the next.

We can always create a ceremony too, perhaps by burning written thoughts to watch the smoke carry them away, thereby releasing them, writing our transgressions onto the shoreline, or placing our intentions on parchment to be planted beneath flowers or trees.

Some ceremonial activities such as a farewell send-off or housewarming party, we may do automatically.

Society also has built-in ceremonies, like graduations and weddings, which may satisfy the need we feel.

Sometimes the shift from denial to acceptance is all that is needed to ease our anxiety, allowing us to bring our memories with us as we move through nervousness to joyful excitement about the good to come.

It can be very challenging to maintain a positive attitude and a measure of faith when we are in the midst of difficult times.

This is partly because we tend to think that if God loves us we will experience that love in the form of positive circumstances.

However, we are like children, and God is our wise Mother who knows what our souls need in order to thrive better than we do.

God is as much as a Mother as God is a Father ... there is no difference or separation.

Just as a young child does not benefit from getting everything that child wants, we also benefit from times of constriction and difficulty to help us grow and learn.

If we keep this in mind, and continue to trust that we are loved even when things are hard, it helps us bear the difficult time with grace.

We are suffering through very difficult times.

Our world is changing every day, and we are each experiencing change in income, family, and society.

This period of time in history is full of difficulty for a lot of us, and we may feel less alone knowing we are not being singled out.

There are extreme energy changes pulsing through the universe at every level and, of course, we are all part of the growing process and the growing pains.

It helps if we remember that life is one phase after another and that this difficult time will inevitably give way to something new and different.

Once again ... "This Too Shall pass."

When we feel overwhelmed we can comfort ourselves with the wise saying: "This too shall pass."

At the same time, when we truly feel that nothing is going right for us, it’s never a bad idea to examine our life and see if there are some changes we can make to alleviate some of the difficulty.

Gently and compassionately exploring the areas giving you the most trouble may reveal things you are holding onto and need to release: unprocessed emotions, unresolved transitions, or negative ways of looking at reality.

As we take responsibility for the things we can change, we can more easily surrender to the things we can’t, remembering all the while that this phase will, without doubt, give way to another.

With love & embracing care,

Rob

The Newness of Spring

Springtime!

I love Snoopy. He is generally happy with life, he is a dreamer, and he cares about others.

Even when he is annoyed, his discontent only lasts until his senses are enlivened by something that makes him smile and his happiness is resurrected.

Look at how pleased and content Woodstock is.

Look at the way Snoopy sees and tends to Woodstock in the above cartoon, and how content Woodstock is knowing that Snoopy has provided a flower for his nest as he rests.

Isn't that what we strive to do?

We deliver daffodils, tulips, lilies and candies in hopes of externalizing the magic of the Season.

We share the celebration of the arrival of Spring and all of the newness and renewal it offers to us.

Now, I may be jumping ahead a little bit here for someone who lives in the Northeast of Pennsylvania. We've enjoyed a few scattered days of 70F at the top of the mountain, yet we are still facing the probability of a dusting of snow and impending frost.

Spring doesn't really "happen" here until June, when most others are embracing Summer.

However, when Spring does make her earthly appearance, it is when when the earth is enticed by lengthening days and warmer temperatures and she begins to awaken from her Winter slumber.

She stretches open and reaches forth to receive the rain that gives drink to flower buds and seedlings. She takes a deep breath, and on her exhale the leaves on trees unfurl like tiny flags heralding her revival as baby animals tumble forth, trumpeting the good news to all who will listen.

Rebirth and repopulation fill the void of winter with flurry and fury as what appeared to be gone forever comes into being once again.

Even though it happens this way every year, we stand in awe, our insides trembling sweetly like the legs of a new foal as we too are reborn.

Does this not seem to happen overnight?

Aren't we also called to awaken from our Winter slumber, stretch forth and receive what those around us have to offer in order for us to be nurtured and grow?

Aren't we also called to allow the warmth of the Season to melt away our ice and snow in order to replenish and supplement others?

Spring is when we fall in love again, speak without thinking, say "yes" to things we would normally refuse. However, all in a good way.

It becomes more difficult to say "no" when the whole world around us appears to be an astounding affirmation of the resilience, richness, and plain, perfect beauty of life.

We may find ourselves feeling several years younger and 10 pounds lighter without having changed a thing. We may feel the urge to cleanse our bodies with a new pattern of eating, clearing our cupboards of cold-weather comfort foods and filling them instead with lighter fare and fresh fruits and vegetables. We may clear our closets of old clothes or cut our hair to express a new facet of who we are, and who we might become.

Springtime inspires us to believe that, along with the earth, we too can change, releasing the past, and giving birth to new ideas, new prospects, new friendships, and new perspectives.

In honor of Spring, we could make a list of the many possibilities we envision for the future and plant it in the earth, surrendering the fertile seeds of our imaginations to the nurturing soil. In tune with the season, we can then watch in wonder as the last of the snow dissolves into the rich brown earth, and stark winter gives way to green possibility.

We might take a sheet of paper, compose our dreams, desires and prayers upon it, and bury it beneath a new annual plant before we embed it to the earth, knowing that for as long as earth permits, that plant will blossom and bloom along with our prayers.

As the last vestiges of Winter depart, all of nature enters into a lively and animated state of renewal.

In the Springtime, Earth’s life energy is awakened from dormancy, and the cycle of life begins anew.

We have the ability to sense this change taking place even before the seasonal flora around us blooms before our eyes. It is natural, therefore, that during Spring many of us begin to feel the urge to clear away the clutter that has accumulated while we've enjoyed being sequestered in our Winter nests.

Now is the time to let the fresh breezes cleanse the energy in our homes.

Interestingly, it is near the same temperature that in Autumn we shutter up and light a fire for warmth, that is Spring we open our windows and invite that same temperature air inside to enliven us.

Spring cleaning is traditionally a way to welcome a new season—one in which we open our doors and windows to let visitors and the sunshine in.

It is also a way to remove stagnant energy from our homes in order to prepare our personal space for the positive, verdant energy of Spring and Summer.

As we sweep away the dust and clutter that has blocked the flow of energy in our homes, we inevitably sweep away some of the issues that may have been blocking us in our lives.

Intention is important, so before cleaning, we might ask ourselves what needs to be cleansed, what can be discarded, and how we can make our homes a reflection of our best selves.

Also, we need to ask how what we cleanse and discard will allow us to reflect not only upon ourselves, but how we can shine forth in brilliance upon the world around us.

Then, we gather our tools and supplies around us, and we begin the cleaning process, much as we do when we work toward brightening, polishing, and shining up the world around us.

Once we've begun Spring Cleaning, we may find that with each piece of clutter we discard and each item that we clean, we begin to feel increasingly energized.

Divesting ourselves of unnecessary possessions can help us to regain clarity of mind while cleaning our windows can help us not only to refocus our vision, but allow others to see us more clearly.

As we clean, we invite healing and vital energy not only into our homes and our hearts, but also into the homes and hearts of all those with whom we know or meet.

Wishing you a brilliant Spring with sunshine surrounding you for all to see,

Rob

Stuck in the Mud

Staying in Depression

Depression comes and goes, and returns.

It is one of the most unavoidable aspects of our lives, yet we somehow embrace it and invite it into our lives once it rears its ugly head.

We try hard to release ourselves from its grasp. but sometimes it's as though we are stuck in the mud, or the quicksand, of depression.

It is when we become stuck in our depression that our own lives become detrimental to our well-being and development.

Depression comes and it goes, ebbs and flows ... just as the ocean. However, it is merely one component to the cycle of life.

Once we understand and embrace that reality, depression can actually serve as a teacher.

It is when we allow ourselves to become trapped by or get stuck in our depression that it becomes detrimental to our well-being and development.

If we notice that we feel closed-off, resentful, heavy-hearted, or that we try very hard to avoid being hurt again, or lose again, there may be a part of us that is still stuck in depression, often shutting ourselves off and staying away from the loving embrace of our friends and partners in life. Perhaps even giving up on faith and hope.

We can become trapped by depression for many reasons.

As children, it was natural for us to cry, throw a tantrum, and allow the experience to move through us. By fully feeling our pain in this way, our emotions would wash us clean, leaving us open and available to new experiences.

As with the ocean, the salty water of our tears would cleanse us.

However, with age we might determine that expressing emotion is no longer appropriate. So we develop a variety of coping strategies to deal with our discomfort.

We may teach ourselves to pack away our feelings down or to run away from them.

Perhaps we begin to believe that tightening up our shells and staying closed and unwilling to try new things will keep us safe from heartbreak, clear of rejection, and free from failure.

We might even become so accustomed to pain, rejection, and failure that the thought of being without it scares us.

However, if we continue to hold onto our issues longer than necessary, we are expending a lot of energy that could instead be channeled into making our life experiences more positive.

It is when we notice that we are continually connecting with the same familiar patterns of pain that we need to consider embracing our feelings and letting go of our hurt.

Whether our pain is from childhood or from an experience last week or today, whether it is loss of health, loss of income, or loss of home -- or fear of such a loss, we need to give the situation and experience room to move. Once it does, we can then connect with the source of our vital energy, the spirit that exists within us and can lead us through our darkness and into the life we are meant to love in, laugh in, and live in.

With love & light,

Rob

Baby Steps

I have a sign on my desk. It reads "Baby Steps".

Its purpose is to remind me that life if to taken one step at a time.

When we walk through the woods, or across a river or stream, we look for little stepping stones to assure us of sure footing and safe passage.

Sometimes these stepping stones are close together.

Sometimes we need to make a rather large stride to reach the next stepping stone.

This is also true of our day to day life.

Our lives are made of stepping stones, one experience after another in perfect and divine order.

The years of our life do not arrive all at once, they greet us day by day.

With the descent of each setting sun, we are able to rest our heads and allow the world to take care of itself for a while.

Although we worry, we may rest assured throughout the night, knowing that the dawn will bring with it a chance to meet our lives anew, donning fresh perspectives and dream-inspired hopes and ambitions.

Within the hours that follow, before we return to sleep once more, there exists time for us to decide how we want to live and learn, laugh and grow, and love once again.

Our lives are sweeter and more manageable for each day we live and love, because we must experience them this way ... one day at a time ... Baby Steps.

Imagine the future stretching out before us and try to notice any tension or feeling of being overwhelmed at the prospect of the journey still to come.

Perhaps we have recently made a lifestyle change, like beginning a new diet or retiring an old habit, beginning a new career or ending a life-long one, embarking upon a new romance or losing the one we love.

The very idea of this new reality can seem daunting.

Maybe we have started a new job, have embarked upon a new relationship, or uprooted our life and moved to a new community far away from our comfort zone.

In one manner or another, we feel an undercurrent of anxiety about our ability to succeed and we worry about our existence and our future.

This is not what is meant for us.

When we shift our focus from what may happen years down the line and return our focus to the day that is before us right now, we may find a measure of calmness and renewed confidence in our abilities.

We may also discover an inner faith that the future will take care of itself.

The way that we show up for our lives today and tomorrow has an enormous affect on who we will be and what we will be experiencing years from now.

My partner has taught me that if we remain fully engaged in the day at hand, enjoying all it has to offer and putting our energy into making the most of it, we will find that we are perfectly ready and able to handle anything the future holds in store for us once it arrives.

There exists a balance in our day to day life which we often fail to see.

Wake each morning with a smile and embrace the opportunities and the challenges ahead.

Give thanks for the new day and life itself.

Embrace nature and what it has to offer, be it a bright and sunny day, or one complete with snow or rain or wind.

We have one life to live. Live it!

With love & light,

Rob

Make & Take Time To Play

Taking A Snow Day.

After a very long Winter of record snowfalls, with more snow falling daily, and grey skies, Spring has finally come to Mount Pocono.

One week ago, we had reached the temperature of 74 F for one day.

Monday was the first full day of Spring.

We were greeted with 8 inches of snow and grey skies again.

Today, two days later, we have over 12 additional inches of snow and await the sleet and ice that nature will deliver over the evening.

At this time of year, we anticipate beautiful Spring mornings with bright skies and birds singing, wishing away the Winter.

When we awoke this morning, there was a beautiful, soft snowfall. The ground was covered once again in soft whiteness and the trees were blanketed with the same beautiful comfort of nature.

It was the perfect day to sleep in late with the curtains open, gazing upon this beautiful gift of snow that so many others have complained about.

For us, it was as though God gave us one last beautiful day of Winter.

We never know when our last day will be, or if we will see the season which is ebbing away again. So, we take each day, and each type of weather, as a gift of nature.

With so much to do all the time in our lives, it can be difficult to find time to simply breathe, think, and explore our landscapes, be they out of doors or within us.

However, it is possible to feed our souls and to briefly separate ourselves from life's frenetic pace by taking a "Snow Day".

Personal Snow Days are best taken when we feel as though we are running on empty with no chance of respite in sight or when we begin to resent the life we once loved because of illness, depression, or stress.

Our Snow Day can go a long way toward dispelling built up stress, provided we give ourselves full permission to indulge in nurturing activities.

It is not a day to worry about what we've missing, what is lingering on our to do list, or fret about the future which inevitably lies ahead of us. Rather, it is a day to accept the opportunity to give ourselves a break from our responsibilities in order that we may return to them in full alertness and awareness. Today's Snow Day, here in the Northeast, was a gift from God.

One last chance to appreciate the beauty of Winter and take a day for ourselves.

One last chance to be trapped inside with our loved ones and reinvest in ourselves.

Not everyone lives in a region where snow falls to the levels we enjoy here.

However, we can create a "Snow Day" whenever our inner spirit tells us we need one, and no matter where we live. I used to refer to these as "me days". Days that I would tend to myself and enjoy the company and fun times with those I love.

Now, through the beauty of God's nature, I prefer the term "Snow Day" as it reminds me of when I was a child and my Mom would leave a large note on the dresser reading "No School Today; Snow Day!" allowing us to sleep in and wake on our own time.

Once we schedule our snow day, we need to to commit to ignoring our chores, not tending to issues at our place of work, and doing only the activities we enjoy, while giving thanks for the opportunity God has granted us. Relax, take a nap in the afternoon, play with pets or children, meditate, pray, work in the garden, watch a film or read a novel.

Take a long walk in the fading afternoon sunshine and then cook a special dinner.

Our Snow Day should be as languid and as lazy as we need it to be.

If necessary, we can prepare for our Snow Day by having whatever we think we will want or need ahead of time.

Clean up or pay the bills the day before the planned Snow Day so that work is not at hand. Disconnect from the telephone and internet. If possible, turn off all electricity.

Once our Snow Day is over, we have a memory to hold on to and reflect upon when needed. We can harvest the joy and peacefulness we felt whenever we need it and keep it close to our hearts.

Understanding that we are a society that values overtime and hard work, we deserve a Snow Day every now and then.

So, the next time that we wake to discover that Nature dropped a foot or more of snow when we hoped for warm and sunny weather, take into consideration that God might have something else in mind for us.

And for those of us in warmer regions ... use your imagination.

Live every season, every day, every moment, as though it's the last.

Wishing you days of snow & love,

Rob

Otto's Run

Learning from Water



Off to the side of our home, is a bridge that leads over the railroad tracks onto a road which is bordered by deep woods.



When we first moved here, over two decades ago, the bridge was closed and there was no traffic on that road. The bridge has since opened, but the traffic remains very light.



We would walk back into the woods for miles, but only a few miles away is a large stream named "Indian Run", where Frank & I used to go for an escape with a packed lunch.



It is also where I used to take our first dog, Otto, for walks to relax after a good day of work, or to recoup after a bad day. We refer to it as "Otto's Run" as we seem to be the only people to visit there and Otto loved to play in the water.



Today, I took our dog Fritz for his first visit to "Otto's Run".



This beautiful stream just seems to wash everything away. The roadway can neither be seen nor heard from it, the walk there is fresh and never tread upon, and the tranquil privacy is particularly peaceful.



There is something about the sound of water that draws us to it. This stream can be heard from the road as it call out, yet the road cannot be heard from the stream.



There is something about water that drowns out the busy-ness of life and washes away all of our worries.


The journey of water as it flows upon the earth can be a mirror of our own paths through life.



Water begins its residence on earth as it falls from the sky or melts from ice and streams down a mountain into a stream.



We come into the world and begin our lives on earth the same way. Like a river that flows within the confines of its banks, we are born with certain defining characteristics that govern our identity.



We are born in a specific time and place, within a specific family, and with certain gifts and challenges. Within these parameters, we move through life, encountering many twists, turns, and obstacles along the way just as a river flows through twisting banks and over rocks and fallen limbs.



Water is a great teacher that shows us how to move through the world with grace, ease, determination, and humility.



When a river breaks at a waterfall, it gains energy and moves on to seek a level at which it comes to rest in a tranquil sea.



In our lives we encounter our own waterfalls. We may fall hard but we always keep moving on, seeking our own level and eager to rest in stillness.



Water can inspire us to not become rigid with fear or cling to what’s familiar.



Water is peaceful.



Water takes the course that nature deals it, goes along its path, and does not waste time clinging to its past, but flows onward without looking back.



Water is brave.



When there is a hole to be filled, water does not run away from it in fear of the dark. But rather, water humbly and bravely fills the empty space.



In the same way, we can use our energy to pass the obstacle in out paths, and we can face the dark moments of our lives rather than run away from them.



Eventually, a river will empty into the sea. Water does not hold back from joining with a larger body, nor does it fear a loss of identity or control.



It gracefully and humbly tumbles into the vastness by contributing its energy and merging without resistance, leaving only cleansing results behind.



When we are able to move beyond our individual egos and become part of something bigger, when we utilize our energy to mute the sound of the traffic going by, when we work to seek our peaceful stillness, that is when we will find our place and we can glisten in the light.



With love & light,



Rob

Emerging From the Grey in Life

The Grey Ways We Numb Ourselves

Perhaps it was the fact that this Winter was terribly cold and grey here in the Northeast, and across the nation.

We had beautiful snow in Pennsylvania, bit no sunshine.

We had ice, but again, no sunshine to illuminate it.

Life has been difficult on many levels all about the globe, and we truly do have many reasons to be discouraged and depressed.

We are born equipped to experience a complex array of diverse emotions.


Many of us, however, are uncomfortable confronting our most powerful emotions.

We may shy away from delight and despair and deny life’s colors by retreating into a world of monotone grey.


At times we sink into a depth of depression, and it affects us in ways that are beyond our comprehension.

We don't always know how to deal with it, so many of us may numb ourselves to what we are truly feeling.


We may do this with the use of denial or through agents such as alcohol or medication. Either way, it’s easier to suppress our emotions than to deal with them, so we may momentarily turn to pleasures such as alcohol, food, sugar, shopping, or too too much television or inter net.

We may even numb our hearts and reject those who truly care about us and whom we love.
While it’s normal to temporarily seek distractions as a means of coping with intense emotions, numbing ourselves prevents us from confronting our issues and keeps us from ever finding resolution or peace.

When we are numb, there is no pain or powerlessness, but there can also be no joy or healing.

The activities that numb us may seem harmless or pleasurable, but using them to numb
ourselves diminishes the quality of our lives.


Numbing ourselves so that we don’t have to feel intense emotions can often satisfy a surface need while blocking our awareness of a deeper need.

We may find solace in food or shopping, drinking alcohol or entertaining ourselves in other ways, when what we really need is spiritual nourishment.


The less we feel in life, good or bad, the less we feel alive and the less we are alive.

Our feelings and emotions add vividness to our experiences and serve to connect us to the world around us.


It is possible to disavow ourselves of numbing behaviors a little at a time and once again taste life’s rich flavors.

When we sense that we are engaging in a particular behavior simply to deaden our emotions, we must stop and ask ourselves "why?".


Examining the feelings that drive us to numb ourselves can help us to understand what is triggering our desire to emotionally fade out. With each numbing activity that we remove which once separated us from the realities of life, we often find ourselves being more aware and experiencing a greater emotionally acuity.

Senses once shrouded by the fog of numbness become sharp and acute. Traumas and pain long hidden then emerge to the forefront of our consciousness and reveal themselves so that we can heal them.


We have a powerful presence of mind and spirit.

It is then that we discover a deeper self - a self that is comfortable experiencing and working through intense emotions with courage and grace.

Often, with depression, there are times when withdrawing from our obligations and taking time to sleep in and be alone are necessary to rejuvenate our energy and renew our connection within ourselves.

However, there are also times when withdrawal is a red flag, indicating an underlying sense of depression or some other problem.

We may not even have consciously decided to isolate ourselves but wake up one day to find that we have been spending most of our time alone, in one manner or another.

We might spend time time with our families & friends only to discover that we've paid absolutely no attention to conversation or our time with them.

We might even become concerned that we have a hearing condition or memory failure only to one day discover that our minds have been consumed by thought and worry, or depression.

It is then that we begin to lose the most valuable pieces of our lives.

I've done this.

We also neglect the feelings and actuality of our partners, our families, our friends ... our faith.

Perhaps it’s been a long time since friends who used to be in touch have just given up on us.

With no one to invite us to a lunch or some shared time together, or with us not accepting the invitation, we sink deeper into alienation, and therefore depression.

The longer our isolation and depression lasts, the harder it becomes to reach out to people once we realize that we need them.

It is as if we have failed to exercise a particular muscle or limb, and now it is so weak we don’t know how to use it.

Many of us don't appreciate this reality, yet, in order to return to a healthy, balanced state of being, that’s exactly what we need to do.

Balance.

We know that our heart is a muscle within our body, and we tend to that as we do a car battery, lest it ever fail us.

We're afraid of the "battery" that gives us life.

But, is it our heart that gives us life?

Our spirit is also a muscle in the eternal world world which we will have and hold forever.

The Spirit of God within us id what guides us, not only in this world, but through all of eternity.

Therefore, we must treat our spirit with love, honor and respect.

My partner wakes every day in in happy mood, loving each of our pets, laughing about everything he can and goes to sleep once his body says to, and he sleeps well.

We can each learn quite a bit from him.

If you find yourself a situation of depression, telephone, email, or text an understanding friend (as I did) who will listen with compassion, not a defensive friend who may have taken your withdrawal personally. The last thing you need is to be chided; a negative response could intensity your isolation.

If you don’t have the type of friend who can offer this, call a spiritual counselor, priest, or therapist. They may be able to help you determine the underlying cause of your depression and isolation and help you find your way out of it.

Once we've been in a pattern of secluding ourselves and are in the depths of depression, it can begin to seem impossible that we could ever reenter the world of friendships, conversations, group activities and success. But with time, trust and faith in the Spirit within us, we will.

Most people will understand if we take the time to explain why we've fallen.

We must then take our time, be gentle with ourselves, and rebuild our lives, starting with one person and building on from there.

We need to reach out to one new person, once at a time.

Before we know it, we will find ourselves back in the company of friends, right where we always were.

With much love & light,

Rob